Are you following your own path?


“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” Buddha

Since childhood we have people worrying about laying down our paths in front of us. Parents expect us to be successful, to grow up and have an incredible career. It’s often something they wanted to do themselves.

This is all great!

But there’s A huge FLAW with this concept.

Not rarely we will end up following someone else’s path.

I see this all the time. A friend that went to law school because that’s what his father, and grandfather did it before him. Another friend that went to medical school because that was her mother’s dream, it’s what her parents expected of her.

I’m not blaming loving parents for wishing the best for their children. But I believe that it’s important for parents to allow their children to start carving their own path since an early age. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you will allow your kid to get a tattoo by the age of 12. Or maybe you will, who knows? 🙂

Whenever you think you’re forcing someone down a certain path, take a step back. Give this person some space of his/her own. Even if this means you will have to see a loved one fail, or face a challenge. This is a natural part of life.

Most of the time, we put ourselves in someone else’s path without consciously noticing it.

How do you know if you’re not following your path?

Some people will never notice they’re following someone else’s dreams. Some will feel miserable for the bigger part of their lives without knowing why.

Not because it’s hard to stop it, but because they’re not interested. You were conditioned since childhood, after all. Why change now?

If you’re not happy with your life. You have no idea why you’re doing the work you do, craving to do something different. Looking for meaning in your life.

Then, my friend, you’re really ahead of the majority of other human beings in this planet.

The first step is discontentment.

If you’ve followed a certain career, or made big changes in your life under someone else’s influence, and you love where you are. You’re probably living a fulfilled life.

This happens all the time. You CAN find your own path along the way. Even if you started as a follower.

However, when you’re feeling miserable, discontent with the way your life is at the moment. It could be a strong signal that you should deviate from the path you’re at.

The second step is knowing where you DON’T want to go.

This is something that I took forever to understand. I was always trying to figure out what I wanted to do, where I wanted to arrive in life. Nothing wrong there, but if you want to take a shortcut, start figuring out what you don’t want in your life.

So now you’re discontent, and you’re starting to discover what you don’t want. Although it may not feel like it,  it is a huge progress. You won’t be wasting time following paths that would lead into something — you now know — you don’t want.

The third step is having the courage to change.


Things won’t change on their own. You will need to take a stand, you will need to make that right turn. Even if you’ve gone left your whole life, and it’s the only direction you’re comfortable with.

Most people are deadly afraid of changes. If this is you, do not worry. It’s only natural.

But you must be willing to take that first step into the unknown. What they call; a leap of faith.

If you’re not willing to change, I’m sorry, but you better be ok with going left forever. You may never know what kind of adventures, and picturesque landscapes you would find if you had the courage to turn right.

Are you willing to live your life in doubt and regret?

It takes dedication, persistence, and courage — to carve your own path.

Is it worth it? You ask.

YES! I can honestly say, without even knowing what is the path you envision for yourself. Following your own, unique path is always worth it — in my opinion.

It doesn’t matter how far you are down the road, there’s always an opportunity to become aware. To pull up, and adjust your coordinates.

Take a good look at your life, right now. Are you following your own path?

About the author

Rod Gomes

I'm sharing my passion for personal growth, self-awareness, and development of the human potential. I have devoted the last 6 years of my life to studying this potential and applying what I have learned as often and as well as possible.

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By Rod Gomes

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